08
Feb
13

Fate/Stay Night

Fate/Stay Night’s cast of clowns.

Fate/Stay Night is an anime series based on a erotic porn video game, so you know it’s going to be high quality. It features the exploits of a blockhead named Shirou who gets caught up in a war for the Holy Grail. He has a really great super power in that he can “fortify” the durability of any inanimate object (like a school desk lol). He also has the amazing ability to act like a complete dumbass in almost any situation.

The story here revolves around the “Fifth Holy Grail War.” These wars take place every 10 years. So, if these wars are every ten years, and this is the fifth one, then they only started 50 years ago. But the Holy Grail was created approximately 2000 years ago. So what about the prior 1950 years? I guess nobody gave a shit about the Holy Grail then. And why is it that the Holy Grail only shows up in Japan? Was Jesus Japanese? Do the Japanese think Jesus was Japanese? It doesn’t make any sense. They might as well have had the series take place on the Moon.

Anyway, a small group of people gather to do battle, and whomever is the victor is given the Holy Grail and any wish they make will be granted. Each person involved in the war can summon a mythical “hero” to do the fighting for them. Shirou’s hero is dubbed “Sabre” but she is really King Arthur. Yes, I know King Arthur was a man. It’s anime, don’t bother trying to make sense out of it.

Sabre tries to do battle with the other heroes: Heracles, Medea, Gilgamesh, etc. Unfortunately, every time she tries to fight, Shirou rushes in to “protect” her, which usually amounts to him getting bludgeoned within an inch of his life. He’s so retarded he doesn’t understand that the hero is supposed to do the fighting. He also doesn’t seem to get that he has no combat experience and his enemies are all well versed in chopping people up. This is a constant source of frustration for Sabre and for myself. Shirou just needs to take a step back and chill the fuck out.

Series dipshit, Shirou Emiya.

Bizarrely, Sabre’s sword is invisible. This could be due to any number of reasons, although I suspect the most likely is that it saved time and money on ink/paint by not having to draw it in every scene. The battle scenes play out like your typical Dragonball Z nonsense with people talking more than fighting. They are painfully drawn out, and typically nobody dies. Well, sure, eventually people do die, but not before they have fought at least 12 or 13 times. Eventually, Sabre’s invisible sword gets replaced with a visible one. The fight scenes were a bit more interesting at this point, but for the most part the fights still consisted of Shirou trying to “protect” the immortal mythical figure who is an expert at combat. Oh, and one of the heroes’ weapons was named Gae Bolg (lol gay bulge).

Since this show was based on a erotic porn video game, it features various girls who all secretly lust after the protagonist’s boner. Female characters Sakura, Rin, and Sabre all want Shirou to give them a ride on his baloney poney. I haven’t played the game, but there’s no doubt you probably get to have graphic animated sex with all of them. In the anime we are not shown any of that, and believe me, it would have improved the series greatly. At one point it is hinted that Shirou may have stuck it to Sabre, but nothing is shown explicitly. Nevertheless, no anime is complete without several girls all wanting one inadequate, awkward dumbass male, and Fate/Stay Night completes that requirement.

If Saber’s clothes were invisible, this show would have been better.

In this show’s favor, it does have a solid resolution to the story and doesn’t have the typical rushed/cliffhanger bullshit anime ending. It’s nice to have closure. Not that I’d be spending my nights laying in bed awake wondering what happened to Shirou and the other dipshits from this series. But it does help improve the overall quality of the show when the creators realize stories should have endings. Also hindering the series was the wooden dialog and the lack of any interesting characters.

Technically, the series is well made. It has proficient animation, although the quality isn’t all that outstanding. If anything, it’s serviceable. It’s not great like Wolf’s Rain and it’s not horrible like Speed Grapher. The acting is good in both languages, so feel free to watch in either Japanese or English, but neither case has any stand-out performances. The soundtrack, again, is decent but doesn’t have any particularly memorable tracks. The writing, pacing, and directing are all simply “good enough” that they make the show watchable.

Some sweet Fate/Stay Night cosplay.

I suppose the biggest problem with this series is that it’s mediocre. The fight sequences are OK but I’ve seen better in plenty of other anime. The animation, music, acting, directing, and writing are all decent, but none of them help the show stand out amongst other series. It’s just sort of a bland, middle-of-the-road, forgettable anime. I suppose the most memorable thing about this series was how big a dumbfuck the main character was. If it wasn’t for him, it could have been a lot better.

Since it’s such an average show, it deserves a score of Average. That’s what you get when you try to make a erotic porn video game into an anime. No, on second thought Shirou was really fucking stupid, and that should count for something.

Verdict: Average Bad

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18 Responses to “Fate/Stay Night”


  1. 1 Cowboy Dev
    February 8, 2013 at 9:31 am

    Yeah, I’d bone King Arthur.

  2. 3 Cowboy Dev
    February 11, 2013 at 8:13 am

    Those cosplayers look dead in the eyes. Like, their realizing “What have I done with my life?!”

  3. 7 WL
    February 14, 2013 at 3:02 pm

    I never thought about the previous wars and the Gae Bolg/gay bulge thing. Thank you for opening my eyes.

  4. February 23, 2013 at 9:30 am

    Yeah. The prequel Fate/Zero is better than this.

    • February 23, 2013 at 10:44 am

      That’s what I’ve heard, but I’m hesitant to try it.

      • 11 Maru
        March 5, 2013 at 5:28 pm

        You really should consider giving Fate/Zero a watch sometime. It’s got Alexander the Great in it. He is an extremely large ham. In fact, you could say he is the Platonic Ideal of the Large Ham. If it were live action, Brian Blessed would play him.

        There are some other awesome characters in it too (in my opinion), but Alexander the Great totally steals the show. Saber has some good parts too. She really cuts a handsome figure in a black suit driving a motorcycle.

        If you’re hesitant, just watch it on Anilinkz sometime when you’re bored and have nothing better to do. Just give it a couple episodes… I believe it hits its stride by about ep 4 or so. Or whenever Alexander the Great appears.

      • March 5, 2013 at 6:18 pm

        I have heard that Fate/Zero is better. I’ll check it out someday. Too bad I have a massive anime backlog.

  5. 13 Adam
    February 25, 2013 at 12:12 am

    Have you seen Cowboy Bebop, Trigun, Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica, or Steins; Gate? If so did you like any of those?

  6. 15 Hetment
    March 29, 2013 at 2:55 am

    I think.. you are really disregarding Fate Stay Night just based on the anime. The visual novel of FSN which you.. regarded as a ‘porn’ game is MUCH more than that. this anime is crap. But the visual novel? Its 1000x better than this anime. Hell the route( Fate) from which this anime was taken is much better in VN. It EXPLAINS why Saber’s sword is invisible( For hiding her all-too famous sword) and why Holy Grail war is started 200 years ago( Every Holy Grail War is ‘supposed’ to take place in 50-60 years. But 5th one happened in 10 years due to a problem in end of 4th grail war).
    And Fate route is the least interesting out of UBW and HF. These routes are much better.
    And did I say Emiya Shirou is a great protagonist because he is much better in the VN? In Fate route also you see Shirou as MUCH better. and in UBW and HF route? He becomes too much badass. So the visual novel shouldnt be just regarded as a porn game.. its MUCH better.
    Fate Zero is great too ^^. It rivals Fate Stay Night VN.

    • March 29, 2013 at 2:54 pm

      It’s good to hear the visual novel was so much better. I wonder why they used one of the weaker paths for the anime? Too bad.

      • 17 Hetment
        March 29, 2013 at 10:24 pm

        Btw.. did you play the visual novel? From judging your words, it seems you havent..
        I do recommend it.. just that its 50+ hours long. But so much worth it.
        Because it was adapted by Studio DEEN.
        Actually, Fate is not WEAKER. Fate is AWESOME. But UBW and HF make Fate small in comparision. In other words, UBW and HF are more awesome.
        But DEEN HAD to ruin it. You know that Caster arc? Where Caster.. kidnaps Sakura? That never ever happened.. and was a fail attempt to add Heavens Feel.
        And that Shirou vs Rin in school? That is UBW’s part.. which they made feel stupid.. It was actually serious with Shirou trrying to really save himself or Rin WILL send him into a disease state with Gandr Shots.
        Berserkers Scream or his roar is also bad in anime. In VN you can actually see the difference in his scream.. Its much more louder and harsh, and thats what his scream is meant to be.
        Btw you asked a ques in your review- Why this war is taking place in Japan only?
        The reason is- Holy Grail War is a war which is ORGANISED by Tohsakas,Einzberns and Makiris( Matou). When it was started for first time, they needed a ‘land’ for summoning the holy grail. And that was given by Tohsaka, hence why its in Japan only. and that too Fuyuki city.Any more explanation and it will be ruining the awesome HF route.

      • March 30, 2013 at 11:15 am

        No, I haven’t played the game. If only I had unlimited time.


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