No More Heroes > Everything Else

Recharge that baby, Travis, yeah, that's hot.

Holy shit, I love this game!

I seriously have not been addicted to a game in a really long time. That is, not until I played No More Heroes. It’s basically an ultra-violent, playable anime with a sense of humor. The premise is that you are Travis Touchdown (awesome name, by the way), an otaku who wants to be the world’s greatest assassin. So, he decides to take out the world’s top 10 assassins with the lightsaber he won in an online auction (where else would you get one?).

This game does not fuck around. You don’t waste any time getting right to decapitating your enemies with geysers of blood. The Wiimote is awesome for this, too. You mash the A button until you are prompted with a direction to swing the controller. After doing that, Travis swings his lightsaber in that direction, and you get a sweet, sweet decapitation. Or if you’re really lucky, you can chop the bad guy in half. The control works perfectly, and is about 50 billion times better than swinging the sword in the godawful Red Steel.

Warning: Villains are extremely hypertensive!

Essentially, the game is completely over the top, and revels in its insanity. Each assassin that you take on is more ridiculous than the last. And the story line continuously breaks through the 4th wall (which means it references itself as a videogame). Usually I hate cut scenes because they are as boring as fuck, but here I couldn’t wait to see them. They are hilarious, have great voice acting, and move things along at an interesting pace. Overall, it had great writing.

There are no more heroes, motherfucker.

The graphics use cel-shading technology, which is something I normally can’t stand, but given that this is basically a playable anime, it worked rather well. The only thing I didn’t like about this game was being forced to do side jobs in between missions in order to get enough cash to move the story forward. That is an annoyance that game developers have been using for years, and really need to stop. I mean, just let me play the fucking game, I don’t want to mow the lawn, collect coconuts, clean graffiti, and rescue goddamn cats. On the positive side, none of the side jobs went on for too long, and never outstayed their welcome.

Gratuitous babe.

In summary, No More Heroes fucking rules. It is 10 times better than any Xbox 360 or PS3 game on the market. And it is 10,000 times better than motherfucking Okami, that piece of shit. No More Heroes has fun gameplay, solid mechanics, a cool story, some really tense moments of difficulty, and overall is just a masterpiece.

What I like best is that there really are no more heroes, everyone is a villain, including the main character.

Verdict: Awesome