Classically Shitty: Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Hilarious? Were there jokes in this movie? I must have missed them.

Breakfast at Tiffany’s is one of those “classic” movies you are supposed to like because film-fags said so. But it’s awful. I can’t think of a single redeeming aspect of this movie. Sure, it has George Peppard of A-Team fame, but that doesn’t enhance the movie. Maybe if halfway through Mr. T burst through a brick wall, gold chains glittering, a machine gun blasting, bullets ripping Holly Golightly’s flesh into threads, the movie could have been cool. But that didn’t happen, so it’s a piece of shit.

The actual breakfast at Tiffany’s is the first scene of the movie. But it’s so vague you have no idea what the fuck is happening. Holly stands outside the store some time before it opens and eats a pastry. That’s it. That was the breakfast at Tiffany’s. Well, the breakfast outside Tiffany’s at any rate. I guess you could end the movie right there. It would be preferable to the non-stop shitfest that follows. And believe me, it is a shitfest. Breakfast at Tiffany’s is boring, has shitty dialogue, a retarded protagonist, and it’s incredibly racist, too. It really has it all. 

Breakfast eaten. Movie over.

Essentially, it’s about this countrified twat named Holly who leave her Podunk small town for the allure of the big city. Unfortunately for her, living in New York City is expensive. Way more expensive than an uneducated talentless hick with no discernible job skills can afford. So, Holly does what any other respectable girl would do: immediately turn to a life of drug smuggling and prostitution. And not the awesome kind with mountains of cocaine like in Scarface. It’s just sort of barely there, in the background, like the writers didn’t think a life of crime would make for an interesting story. So, instead of drug-fueled orgies (which is what every scene should have been), we are “treated” to dull meandering conversations, gossip about neighbors, catty jealousy, and over-the-top racism.

Yeah that’s right, racism. Micky Rooney plays a caricature of a Japanese person. He has squinty eyes, wears yellow makeup, speaks with a really bad Engrish accent, and sports a huge pair of big fake buck teeth. The character isn’t so much a stereotype as he is an outright racist statement. He is what old white Hollywood Fuckos think Japanese people are like. Yeah, all those years spent living in California, none of them probably ever even saw a Japanese person, what with them in the internment camps and all.

"Herro?! Herro?! Terephone very hard to use!"

Basically, nothing really happens in this movie. The drug-smuggling plot goes nowhere, the prostitution plot goes nowhere, Buddy Ebsen shows up for a couple of scenes just to cash a paycheck, and Holly acts like a spoiled, clueless bitch. The central “focus” of the movie (and saying it has a focus at all is being generous) is a bland, watered-down romance between two generic white people. It’s impossible to give a fuck about either of them.

I can’t say why Breakfast at Tiffany’s was a popular movie when it was released. I guess film-goers had lower standards back then. Well, not that they have good standards now, but at least today we have a lot more options. What I can tell you is why the movie remains popular to this day. There is only one reason, and here it is:

She smokes in every scene in this movie.

That’s it. That picture of Audrey Hepburn is the only reason why anyone gives a flying fuck about this movie. They like the look she has. She looks classy and mysterious and kind of fun all together. She evokes nostalgia of a time gone by for people who never lived in that time. It is so famous that it appears on all sorts of things, in all sorts of places it doesn’t belong. For example:


Hepburn’s iconic image elicits a romantic view of what life in late 1950s/early 1960s New York City was like. But guess what? It wasn’t like that at all. Here’s what it really looked like:

Just an average day in NYC.

I’d bet money that 90% of the people who have that fucking Audrey Hepburn picture hanging somewhere (or own the tacky glassware) have never seen Breakfast at Tiffany’s. If they had, they’d get rid of that shit immediately. But I suppose it’s better they haven’t seen it, and go on blissfully unaware of how terrible it is. It’s better that no one actually watch this rotten turd of a movie.

Breakfast at Tiffany’s is billed as a “hilarious romantic comedy” but it isn’t romantic and there is no comedy. I can’t remember laughing once. I can’t remember there being any jokes. Unless you count the overt racism as comedic. Or maybe in the 1950s they thought prostitution and drug-smuggling was inherently funny? I don’t know. I can’t figure it out. It’s like they didn’t know what to label it as (“piece of shit” wouldn’t have brought in film-goers), so they just chose a random genre. It’s like billing Robocop as a “fantasy adventure” film.

I would totally watch this movie.

Holly Golightly is a terrible protagonist. She’s jealous and catty. She smokes like a chimney. She’s a drug-smuggling prostitute. Are we supposed to feel bad for a drug-smuggling prostitute when things don’t go her way? Give me a fucking break. The romance is stilted and ridiculous. It isn’t funny. It’s racist. Worst of all, it’s incredibly boring. Breakfast at Tiffany’s is a non-stop shitfest. This movie is a waste of time, and all copies should be burned immediately. No one should ever have another breakfast at Tiffany’s. You know what we should have instead? Breakfast at Awesomely Shitty. I’ll bring the Batter Blaster.

This rules.

Verdict: Shitty

Check out these other entries in the Classically Shitty series:

The Hustler

2001: A Space Odyssey

January 29, 2012 – Irony Update

On WordPress, after you publish a new post, a sidebar appears with a bunch of shit I could care less about. However, when I posted this review, a quote appeared that I could not ignore. It was from Truman Capote, the author of the book Breakfast at Tiffany’s.

The quote from Capote is, “That isn’t writing at all, it’s typing.” Of course, in the context here it is incredibly ambiguous. Does he mean my review of the movie is just nonsensical “typing”? Does he mean Breakfast at Tiffany’s is a piece of shit? Could it be he means the screenwriters of the movie turned his book into a steaming turd? Or WordPress might just have some algorithm that pulled a Capote quote when it saw the title of the post contained the words Breakfast at Tiffany’s.

Whatever the case may be, I think it is hilarious that Capote should bring me a message from beyond the grave as I trashed his work for all the Internet to see. Thanks for the irony bomb, Capote. It made me laugh. Maybe next time I will berate some of Shakespeare’s works and see if a zombie version of The Bard comes after me.

87 Responses to “Classically Shitty: Breakfast at Tiffany’s”

  1. January 28, 2012 at 8:01 am

    Dude. I laugh so hard when I read your shit, Brik. Seriously. That’s hysterical.

    I’m going to cross this off my MTESS list right now, just for fear of you posting up on that thread. :D

  2. 5 Jay
    January 28, 2012 at 1:48 pm

    Robocop… on a freakin’ UNICORN!?!??!?

    My head just exploded.

    I’ll be in my bunk.

  3. January 29, 2012 at 11:14 am

    Breakfast at Awesomely Shitty?

    I’ll be back tomorrow morning.

  4. January 29, 2012 at 9:34 pm

    Brik, you are amazing. Keep up the excellent work good sir.

  5. 9 defectron
    March 31, 2012 at 3:35 pm

    Yes, your review raises a valid point. Audreys character has a very iconic look, I am tempted to for no reason at all make a character in a story whose settting is completely different look like that and smoke classy ciggarette alot. She will also interact with a cockney space lizard who lives in central park. Yes, this will win several major awards!

  6. 11 Rich
    June 14, 2012 at 6:20 pm

    You sir are brilliant!!! Lmao!! Could not have agreed more! I love how people almost get teary eyed talking about this slop! Keep up the good work

  7. 12 Elle
    July 3, 2012 at 9:20 pm

    You are so right! I too have loved the Audrey Hepburne images I’ve even used them as my desktop background on my computer but I had never seen Breakfast at Tiffanys. I decided to watch it tonight while browsing Netflix and it I could not believe how incredibly racist & offensive this film is. I didn’t watch past the first 5 minutes or whenever it was that we are introduced to this ridiculous character. I wish I hadn’t bothered with this piece of shit.

    • July 5, 2012 at 10:26 am

      I’m glad you turned the movie off, because it only got worse from there. You at least spared yourself additional pain and suffering. At least you’ll always have your Audrey Hepburn images to keep you company.

  8. July 8, 2012 at 2:50 am

    Oh Brik, when I first saw this article it was before you amended it to include the quote from Capote that somehow got linked to this article. I haven’t seen Breakfast at Tiffany’s, but I do know a few bits that might interest you.

    Firstly, Capote didn’t write the screenplay for the film. Some other guy adapted it. Not sure if this is good or bad, but basically what this means is that the film being shitty isn’t necessarily a reflection on the quality of Capote’s book – it might be good, but bleh, I haven’t read that either.
    Secondly, Breakfast at Tiffany’s is directed by Blake Edwards, the same fellow who wrote/directed the original The Pink Panter series of films starring Peter Sellers. Now, the original is good, A Shot in the Dark is fantastic, and the panther films after those steadily decline in quality. You’ve probably seen them, but if you haven’t, I hope Edwards’s involvement in Tiffany’s doesn’t deter you from seeing them.

    • July 8, 2012 at 7:35 am

      I didn’t really pay attention to who directed this trash. I have seen the first couple of Pink Panther movies and enjoyed them. I haven’t seen them all, but if they decline in quality as time goes on, then I may just have to endure the torture in order to write a future post on them. Thanks!

  9. August 26, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    Oh thank goodness. I watched this movie today and thought something was wrong with me because I thought I was the only person in the world that thought it sucked. What a stupid movie. Thanks for letting me know I’m not crazy.

    • August 27, 2012 at 8:40 am

      You are not crazy! The whole reason I started this series was to let people know that these movies suck, and you aren’t a weirdo for thinking the same thing.

      • 18 Me
        July 9, 2013 at 2:47 am

        I have had this film on my harddrive for ages so i put it on thia evening. it is still playing (they are searching for cat right now) while i am simultaneously researching other things such as how many other people have found the entire film nauseating.

        Things which i found appalling and/or strange
        – when she jumps into bed with him at the very beginning (then has a weird immediate nightmare WTF?)
        – they just both happen to be prostitues
        – Mickey Rooney’s entire character is outrageous
        – the only potential for a good plot line was the ‘weather reports’ smuggling and it just ends
        – that party
        – the quote “is she a phony?” Uh yes
        – the singing scene

        Oh dear I just can’t ever switch off a movie….

        Thanks for a wonderful blog. I will continue to read more posts.

      • July 9, 2013 at 9:52 am

        Thanks for coming by. Enjoy the other posts!

  10. August 29, 2012 at 8:42 am

    you are ignorant and you obviously know nothing about cinema!
    please stay on your level and continue watching american comedies full of penis jokes. do not disgrace the classics by even reading the titles of the worlds famous films.
    as there are people who cant do science , there are people who do not understand cinematography and what is important in the film.
    your parody of an argument is ridiculous and only shows how poor is your language and how low is your iq.

  11. August 29, 2012 at 10:41 am

    Angela, you’re absolutely right. Obviously, I know “nothing about cinema.” My not liking a movie you enjoy is certainly proof of that. How dare I express my opinion on my blog!

    I will continue to watch “american comedies full of penis jokes” because those are the only things I am capable of watching. Just a cursory look through this blog you will find that 99% of the posts are dedicated to “american comedies full of penis jokes.”

    “your parody of an argument is ridiculous and only shows how poor is your language and how low is your iq.” — This is also true. My language is quite poor. I will try to aspire to your evident knowledge of language, grammar, and sentence structure. I had no idea that “proper language” included failure to use any capitalization and the continuous use of run-on sentences.

    I will never understand “what is important in the film”, and I would appreciate your guidance, as you clearly seem to know something I don’t. Rest assured, Angela, I will stay on my “level.” Never again shall I attempt to reach the lofty heights of someone who enjoys the smell of their own farts like you.

  12. 27 Alice
    September 25, 2012 at 8:02 pm

    you should really read the book, its great. while the movie’s shit- it changes a lot and takes away Capote’s skilled writing and attractive style which is really what makes his novel so good. and all things you complained about in the movie I’d say are totally fixed in the book. Capote hated the movie and disagreed with the directors/producers etc. who totally botched his work

    • September 26, 2012 at 8:32 am

      Thanks for the reply, Alice. I’m glad to hear that the book was so much better than the movie, and I sort of suspected that was the case. Unfortunately, the movie has left me so traumatized there is virtually no chance I’ll ever read the book.

  13. 29 Heidi Strauss
    December 18, 2012 at 1:33 am

    I personally love Breakfast At Tiffany’s, although in a way I can understand how someone (and especially a male) wouldn’t like it. You have to relate to Holly’s character in a certain way to like it. I think you missed the meaning of it a bit. To me it is about who you are born as vs. the person you want to be and which one ends up being truer in the end. In the book and movie there is a quote about Holly being a “phony, but a real phony..”, the movie is about escaping from yourself. Holly is a much darker character in the book, than in the movie. Capote wanted Marilyn Monroe to play Holly originally because he felt that in a way she embodied Holly. Monroe transformed herself but would always be troubled because of what she felt she was deep down. Audrey ended up playing Holly because Hollywood felt that Monroe was too sensual for the part and it would cause too much scandal because of who the character in the book really was. Audrey didn’t transform herself, she has always been a high class bourgeoisie type, so they thought that audiences would be more comfortable seeing her in the role. I’m not saying I didn’t like Audrey in the role, I loved her in it, but her as Holly does make the meaning a bit more vague. Although, I think that people really did fall for Audrey as Holly partially for your given reasons, but also because it gives people hope that you might really be able to transform yourself into something iconic like Audrey on the Breakfast At Tiffany’s poster or Marilyn Monroe in her white dress. You have to be a dreamer. I think this review is looking at the film shallowly. That is my opinion, but to each their own. If you can’t relate, you can’t relate.

    • December 18, 2012 at 9:38 am

      Yeah, I definitely can’t relate to this movie. Although, I do appreciate your interpretation. And if it helps you understand where I’m coming from, the point of the Classically Shitty series is to look at these films as shallowly as possible. :)

  14. 31 IRIS
    December 26, 2012 at 4:51 am

    Dear God I thought I was the only one who hated this movie. I only watched it because posters of Audrey were up in girl’s dorm room as center pieces of art. WHAT THE FUCK? I thought the movie would have some witty banter but all I see now when I look at the poster is a dumb self absorbed bitch. Don’t even get me started on the poor depiction of that Asian man.

    Thank you so much for writing this. God bless AMERICA.

  15. 33 Julie P
    February 12, 2013 at 10:31 am

    i watched Breakfast at Tiffany’s last night for the first time and I am almost 40 years old. YOU ARE CORRECT and also you are awesome for saying this is a piece of total crap film. A+ to you!

  16. 35 dwc
    March 2, 2013 at 3:02 pm

    I’m watching the movie right now! But it’s a tiny window in the corner of my screen, because it didn’t deserve any more space than that. I wanted to see what all the fuss was all about (and since I live in NYC, I wanted to see what it looked like back in the 60’s). But as soon as I saw the racism with the Asian guy in the first scene, I was done. My goal here is very simple: I’m trying to see if I can make it through to the end without dying. What doesn’t kill me only makes me stronger.

  17. March 7, 2013 at 11:27 am

    You’re so right…
    When I bought the movie, I was expecting something amazing, glamorous, beautiful… but I just didn’t like it.

  18. 38 Taryn
    March 13, 2013 at 4:03 am

    As a woman who loves fashion, I was intrigued by this movie.

    As a woman who loves literature, I fell in love with this book.

    As a woman who has gone through the same emotions, I identify with Holly

    Yes, Holly Golightly is a fashion icon. Her glamorous lifestyle and chic mannerisms naturally captured the hearts of many.

    Capote insists that she’s more than that though. She advocates a free spirited approach, but she is as guarded as they come. She has a sentimental heart and a skeptical mind. And she is acutely aware of the emptiness this approach has left inside her. There’s beauty and sadness in her dichotomies.

    I’m personally offended by critiques of art that don’t truly understand the art. If you don’t understand, understand that you don’t understand. It is art. Every bit of it isn’t meant for everybody.

    Don’t get me wrong; I fully advocate the freedom to express your dislike. However, there’s a difference between that and bashing someone’s artistry simply because it does not speak to you in particular.

    • March 13, 2013 at 8:30 am

      I completely get where you’re coming from. Nevertheless, we’ll have to disagree as to whether this movie constitutes “art.” Defining art can be difficult. From my point of view, movies with drug-smuggling prostitutes, horrible racist caricatures, and thread-bare plots don’t count as art. You are well within your rights to enjoy this movie, but I find nothing redeeming in it whatsoever.

  19. 40 Cat
    April 1, 2013 at 2:17 am

    Sweet Jesus on a pogo stick, you DO like to hear yourself talk don’t you?

    My guess is that you’re a fan of the “Hangover” or “Fast and Furious” type of film. It’s okay. You have the Internet to pat you on the head and tell you your inane ramblings are wonderful.

    Ah. For Truman to be alive and have his way with your trite, insanely pathetic ass. The world wide web, it’s given ranting “writers” like yourself a lovely place to be LOUDLY incompetent.

    Go with god, fool. Just because you don’t get it don’t make it true.

    • April 1, 2013 at 8:45 am

      Here’s what you just did: 1) Read my opinion of Breakfast at Tiffany’s, and got butthurt because you like the movie and I didn’t. 2) Assumed that I like movies you do not (i.e. The Fast and The Furious) — news flash: I don’t. 3) Decided that the Internet is SERIOUS BUSINESS and had to let me know how dumb I am. I’m sure you and Truman Capote must have been best friends, as I see you refer to him on a first name basis. Since you must be one of his last living friends on Earth, I’m glad you took time out of your important schedule to leave this comment on my blog. Thanks, and have a nice day!

  20. 42 a
    October 15, 2013 at 7:03 am

    I don’t like the film because I don’t like people escaping reality. If you don’t like your life change it. Go get a qualification and a real job. I would hate to be surrounded by phony people trying to convince everyone that they are real “real phonies” or more like deluded! give me a break!

    • 44 nofishsloan
      October 19, 2015 at 1:31 am

      You say you don’t like it because Holly was trying to escape reality so she should have just changed her life… But she did do that. She hates living at the farm so she changed her name and her persona into something that she thought she wanted. It wasn’t until she got the life she wanted that she realized she hated it. So you’re partially right: at first she did well but once her ‘dream life’ became as vapid as her then she tried to escape reality.
      So I going to guess that since you say you don’t like movies where people try to escape reality, you must not like any films that have a drug abuse theme (ie-requiem for a dream or trainspotting). Is that accurate?

  21. 45 Keya
    January 4, 2014 at 4:53 am

    OMG Finally someon talking some sense! When I was a teenage girl, movies like Breakfast at Tiffany’s and Pretty Woman were adored, and I met guys later at uni and work who sought out their “perfect girls” based on the leading ladies, who were pretty but fragile, needy and economically dependent. They maintain a stylish look but are supremely superficial, don’t work (no job or business), have no friends or sense of community blah blah. I’ve never been able to sit through Breakfast at Tiffany’s (and if you watch Blood Diamond, there must be sense of outrage about the diamond industry), it’s intensely boring and shallow.
    It’s on More 4 TV right now, and my bristles just came up, URGH! Hepburn is a chain-smoking anorexic, work-shy crazy woman. I still can’t believe she was the pin-up for generations of boys and girls….

  22. 47 Irma
    April 1, 2014 at 1:17 pm

    I actually really love this movie. I used to watch it over and over again with my mom when I was little, (as an immigrant, she didn’t quite understand what it was about, and as a 5 year old, neither did I!) I remember loving to watch the pretty scenes and dresses. I rewound the VHS to “Moon River” so many times that the tape wore out! Later on, in high school, I was really able to relate to Holly. She closes herself off from people and tries to depend on herself to extremes because she’s scared of being put in vulnerable positions and being let down, and that was how I felt at the time (typical angsty teen, eh?). She was pretending to be something she wasn’t, and feigned this “I Don’t Care” attitude. I remember feeling like Paul was talking to me during his ending monologue. I still watch it every so often, cry every time, and always feel satisfied at the end. Perhaps this movie holds sentimental value to me and that clouds my judgement, but man, It’s probably one of my favourite films. However, I definitely see where you’re coming from in your critique. Most of my friends hate it too. Oh well!

    I 100% agree that it is grossly racist, though!

    • April 5, 2014 at 8:16 am

      Nostalgia can cloud anyone’s judgment. I can’t blame you for liking something based on nostalgia. There’s lots of shitty things I like because of nostalgia. At least we agree this movie is terribly racist!

  23. 49 Joanna
    April 8, 2014 at 5:47 pm

    Suck a dick. This movie is better than life

  24. 51 Ben
    August 2, 2014 at 12:29 am

    I saw this movie a few years – well part of the movie anyway, I couldn’t sit through it till the end (though I had already seen the very end on an earlier occasion). Mickey Rooney’s portrayal of Mr. Yunioshi was the real killer for me, it left me embarrassed for all Westerners. I would too ashamed to watch this with a real Asian in the room. This isn’t the only movie to use Whites to play Asian roles, though it perhaps the most embarrassing example of the practice. Why didn’t Hollywood use real Asians?

    I’ve just been watching the 1957 movie ‘Sayonara’ in which Ricardo Montalban , a Mexican actor, plays a Japanese man. WTF – I went straight to Google to find why they would do such a thing and that eventually lead me to your blog.

    I have fond memories of a movie a saw as a young child, ‘7 Faces of Dr. Lao’ (1964) in which Tony Randall plays the titular character Dr. Lao, a Chinese man, as well as many other characters (thus the title). I remember it being a very funny movie and being totally in awe of Tony Randall’s portrayal of so many varied characters in the one movie. I now live in fear of seeing the movie again and cringing at Tony Randall’s portrayal of Dr. Lao, and thereby completely overwriting my childhood memories of this much loved film.

    I found no explanation for the practice but I assume that the real Asians just weren’t ‘Asian’ enough for the producers.

    • August 2, 2014 at 2:05 pm

      You echo my thoughts exactly. It’s disgusting every time they use an actor to play a character of a different race, and then make them into some kind of insulting caricature. Sometimes it works (only example I can think of is Ricardo Montalban as Khan in Star Trek) because the character’s race doesn’t really matter, but when the race is important, not using an actor of said race is a bad idea.

  25. 53 xz03
    September 9, 2014 at 4:19 pm

    I laughed very much this was very funny. I saw this movie and was not that charmed. My favorite scenes were the party and candy store. I agree that little black dress look is more the icon haha. I read a quick summary of the novel and it already sounds better. Drastically different.

  26. 55 xz03
    September 9, 2014 at 4:23 pm

    I laughed this was hilarious. Sorry I know I’m a couple years late here.

    I think the little black dress look is more the icon. I really wasn’t that charmed by the movie and wondered if anyone felt the same.

    • September 13, 2014 at 9:46 am

      Don’t worry about being late to the party. This is historically one of my more popular posts. The movie is absolutely dreadful.

      • 57 ana
        September 13, 2014 at 5:41 pm

        I found out your block because I was watching the movie and I just did not get! It was also so boring! Yes, racist not just with Asian people but about Latin people. She says something like her 9!! Children with the Brazilian husband would be dark but classy!! Ha ha wow! The character represented by Audrey seems like a very uneducated women… the only part that really push my buttons was when she abandoned Cat!! I though, really? On top of everything!! Happily she didn’t. Actually, I love the cat, the only thing nice that movie has and he also was an excellent actor. Thank for your blog, good job!

      • September 15, 2014 at 7:42 am

        You’re welcome. I’m glad you enjoyed the post.

  27. 59 Kim
    October 30, 2014 at 8:44 pm

    Omg I just watched this movie on Netflix tonight. I watched it a few years back but didn’t care for it. So I was trying to force myself to watch it again, hoping that this time something might click to make me understand the hype…NOT… And I’m so glad I’m not alone. I really thought something was wrong with me. It’s truly offensive that it’s labeled “a classic”. Now I need to wash the bad taste out of my mouth with an actual “classic”… Any ideas?

  28. 61 marien german
    January 5, 2015 at 7:27 pm

    Finally watched it. Dont get the hubbub. Disappointed NY wasnt shown more, the rainbow room, russian tea room, tavern on the green. She was boring and vapid. Leave it to hollywood to glamorize racism, prostituion and noone here mentioned that Doc Golightly was a creep that married a 14 year old. For all her sophistiction…she seemed to own only the one black dress with the fuzzy hem. The awards should hVe gone to cat, he did stunts..when he landed on the door, and jumping on the guy and shelf and did you see how he portrayed the misery of being wet and cold at the end…, he even did some nudity when he flashed us his balls……Bravo Cat!!!

  29. 62 marien german
    January 5, 2015 at 7:32 pm

    Finally watched it. Dont get the hubbub. Disappointed NY wasnt shown more, the Rainbow Room, Russian Tea Room, Tavern on the Green, Rock Center. She was boring and vapid. Leave it to hollywood to glamorize racism, prostitution and no one here mentioned that Doc Golightly was a creep that married a 14 year old. For all her sophistiction the character is known for…she seemed to own only the one black dress with the fuzzy hem. The awards should hVe gone to cat, he did stunts..when he landed on the door, and jumping on the guy and shelf and did you see how he portrayed the misery of being wet and cold at the end…, he even did some nudity when he flashed us his balls on the shelf or fridge scene…..Bravo Cat!!!

  30. February 2, 2015 at 2:28 am

    Not only was I dying of laughter but I was also pointing at my phone and yelling, “Yes! This guy gets it! When I review this movie im just going to link to his review and say THIS.” It’s not just humor – everything you said is exactly right. This move f-Ing SUCKS!!! I love classic films but my god what a horrible piece of shit.

    • February 2, 2015 at 3:42 pm

      The hate for this movie is so strong… I love it.

      • February 2, 2015 at 4:20 pm

        I just wrote my 1,112 word review (I’m relaunching my old movie review site at year’s end, so trying to get content for it now; I used to be an online film critic back about ten years ago, but have since directed my own film, Amy Alyson Fans, an actual romantic comedy unlike this POS), which is definitely nowhere near as funny and incredible as yours, but it felt good to write it anyway and just get it all off my chest. I’ll share with you the last paragraph: “As with every other element of the profoundly overrated and lousy Breakfast at Tiffany’s, even the best part of the film showcases the laziness of the writers. By far the best actor in the movie is Holly’s cat, which is actually named “Cat,” who expresses more emotion and sadness while being unceremoniously tossed out into the rain than any of the human cast displays in the entire movie. The cat also has some solid stunt work, including an impressive leap onto Paul’s shoulders once and a death grip onto the window shutters after Holly cruelly throws Cat like a newspaper delivery boy tosses the morning news. In a perfect world, every copy of Breakfast at Tiffany’s could likewise be thrown unceremoniously off the highest cliff into the deepest ocean and never seen again. Unfortunately, we don’t live in a perfect world, so the best option is to avoid seeing this “classic” movie and save yourselves two hours that could be better spent on, frankly, anything, even banging your head into the wall.”

      • February 10, 2015 at 9:37 am

        You raise an excellent point, the cat really is the best thing about this movie. Thanks for the comment!

  31. February 26, 2015 at 12:56 pm

    It is almost amusing how ignorant you are.

    • February 26, 2015 at 3:16 pm

      How is he “ignorant” for not liking an extremely terrible film? I have seen almost every film on the AFI’s Top 100, I have studied film history in college and know of every film movement from German Expressionism to French New Wave, and seen some of the first “movies” ever made, not to mention I directed my own feature film, Amy Alyson Fans (available on digital media outlets everywhere), so I think I’m pretty well qualified to judge other movies. I judge Breakfast at Tiffany’s to be a terrible pile of ass just like Brik does, and he has a whole site devoted to watching movies, so he’s clearly a fan. What are your qualifications? It’s almost amusing to see someone call anyone else ignorant. I would say if you think this is what passes for great “classic” cinema, YOU are the one who is ignorant and needs to delve into some of the true classics of the past, like Casablanca, Touch of Evil, Citizen Kane, The Sting, etc. and stop wasting time with mediocre drivel.

      • February 26, 2015 at 3:49 pm

        Thanks for helping me out.

        It’s amusing to me when someone calls me stupid or ignorant or (my favorite) tells me I didn’t “get” the movie, and then offers no rebuttal or reason why the movie is so great. It’s like their brains don’t work well enough to form any sort of rational argument so they just throw out an insult and leave.

      • February 26, 2015 at 4:02 pm

        Oops I did call this movie “mediocre,” I didn’t mean to say that. That’s way too high of praise, there is no point at which Breakfast at Tiffany’s even sniffs mediocrity, let alone goodness. It’s actually one of my favorite things when someone says, “Wow, you didn’t like [insert movie, say, Gosford Park]? You must not have gotten it!” NO, I clearly DIDN’T get it, that’s the point! I don’t “get” anything shitty, because there’s nothing to get. It’s like comedy, if you have to explain to me why such and such movie is funny, it obviously wasn’t that funny (at least to me), because great comedy doesn’t need explanation. It’s just funny immediately, like you said of Zoolander. My girlfriend didn’t like it, so I tried to explain to her (I was that guy), but I just ended up laughing to myself while explaining the jokes, her staring at me blankly, and finally saying, “Yeah… I guess it’s just not your type of humor… Bulimic… you read minds?! Hehehe *more blank stares* Ahh… good times, good times. I’m going to go grab a snack while you judge me.”

    • February 26, 2015 at 2:18 pm

      Let me know if I ever go from almost to actually amusing!

  32. 73 Staci
    March 3, 2015 at 1:28 am

    I finally watched this movie on Amazon Prime and I have to agree with you….. by far one of the worst movies I have ever wactched! I stumbled across your blog after googling halfway through the movie “breakfast at tiffany’s is terrible” I had to reassure myself I was not the only one who felt this way. I am confused as to why this is a classic, there was not one part that I enjoyed. Thank you for your entry!

  33. 75 Skye
    July 7, 2015 at 6:37 pm

    Just tried to watch this movie with my wife. We made it to the party scene but then had to bail. Up to that point nothing had happened. I’m with you. The way humans are portrayed is disturbing.I had heard so much about this film for so many years, and we were looking forward to watching it. What a disappointment. As for the Capote quote, he famously said that about Kerouac. See link: https://balanfleming.wordpress.com/2011/02/27/author-feuds-truman-capote-vs-jack-kerouac/

  34. 77 nofishsloan
    October 19, 2015 at 1:02 am

    I’m not sure if you’ll see this as this post is 3 years old, but I wanted to say this so I am.

    At first I was annoyed how you called the film shit simply because you don’t like this type of movie. But then I climbed off my horse and remembered that you’re totally entitled to your own opinion.
    I think it’s amusing how a few people started saying that you were ignorant simply because you were staring your opinion! “How dare you have a differing view than me!” In fact, by them bashing you’re opinion and saying you’re “ignorant” really only served to prove how ignorant they are hahaha.
    So, I like the movie for several reasons. I love Audrey Hepburn (you should watch Roman Holiday, it’s a romantic comedy thats surprisingly good), I’ve always liked 50’s style, and I find some of the word play fun.
    The places you’re right: the character Holly is disgustingly self-absorbed and an annoying twat who thinks she’s so fucking special just because she reinvented herself. She’s also a hypocrit- she snoops on the main guy and then gets pissed off when he asks her a pointed question. Also, the plot is thin, for a film that tries so hard to be intellectually playful it’s all just very shallow.
    Where I disagree with you: if you say that Mickey Rooney’s character is racist then you should also say that some of the white characters are also racist: the white males who are chovanist pigs. Then there’s Holly’s manager who is also an over-the-top “portrayal” of a money hungry ass. I would say that stereotypes can perpetuate racism if a person is stupid enough to take it seriously instead of as a joke. This is a sensitive topic as some people would say that society should do away with using stereotypes for a punchline. But if you agree with this then you should be saying this about Mr. T- a stereotype of a tough ghetto black male. Basically if you’re going to make a statement you can’t pick and choose who it applies to simply because you’re biased. Would you agree?
    I don’t get why the film is a “classic” though… Even taking it as a light heated film it’s not like it’s anything amazing. I think people just like it because they like the style and they think that anything Audrey Hepburn touches is gold… I mean I like it for its aesthetics but I think some people think that liking it makes them “classy” and “interesting” simply because they like an older film. It’s fucking stupid… But then again so many people are.
    I really hope that you respond to this because I read some of your other comments and was pleased to find that you’re not as obnoxious as I thought you were! Your responses were well thought out and intelligent, I really like that and I really like having a fun debate :D

    • October 21, 2015 at 1:22 pm

      Thank you for your well-reasoned comment. I’ll try my best to respond to your points.

      First, I never said I didn’t like this kind of movie. Like you, I kind of like the appeal of 50s style, and clever word play and puns are fun when done correctly. I have nothing against romantic comedies per se, but so many of them are cliché and cheesy, it’s hard to find good ones.

      We do seem to agree about Holly’s character, and the plot being thin, so that’s good.

      I think the point I was trying to make about Mickey Rooney wasn’t to say that everyone also comes off as good. If they want to use an Asian character, they should cast an Asian actor. Failing that, they should just rewrite the character. When you use someone to play a particular race, and they play up that race’s stereotypes, it is immediately offensive to said race. Even if it is done for jokes, it is racist, and I don’t think many Asian people would find it funny. The film purposely portrays Rooney’s Asian character as a buffoon, which is not OK.

      Other people, like Mr. T, don’t really fall into that category. Yeah, he’s a tough black man, but he’s basically playing himself. He really is a tough black man. He’s not playing a stereotype, and he’s not a white guy in black face making fun of specific traits of black people. Many of the white characters are chauvinist pigs, I agree with you, and I think that it’s a product of the times the film was made.

      Thanks again for leaving your thoughtful comments, and feel free to read the other “Classically Shitty” posts on my blog.

  35. 79 Amanda
    October 25, 2015 at 6:38 pm

    This was hilarious. Want to know how I found this review? I googled.. “Why the fuck do people like breakfast at tiffanys” then I found this diamond. This is exactly how I felt about the movie. No plot. No humor. the landlord bit is racist. And Audrey Hepburn character is not even lovable. Just all shit

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