The Town, Red Sun

The Town

Da fackin’ cast of Da fackin’ Town.

“Hey Tawmmy, guess what? That cawksuckah Ben Affuck made a movie called The Town. This queah made a lawt of shitty movies in the past like Reindeah Games and Ahmahgedon. Now awll of a sudden he thinks he’s a fackin’ directah. Anyway, this heah movie is about some bank rawbbahs from Chahrlestown. They rawb a bunch’a banks in Bawston and try to get away from da Feds. Dougie, Jem, Gloansy, and Dez ah the robbahs and they do pretty good for awhile, until Dougie gets a hahd-on for a hawstage they took earliah named Claire. Dougie ain’t no queah like some guys I know from Southie, and he dates Claire for awhile and tries to keep his double lives separate. Meantime this big faggy retahd Fed dude named Frawley is goin’ after ’em, tryin’ to put Dougie and his crew behind bahs. There’s a lot of shoot-outs and beatin’s and we get to see our fayah city of Bawston a lawt. It’s gawt some good writin’ and actin’ and Affuck does a fackin’ good job’a directin’. For a queah, anyway. Tawmmy, you should really check out this movie, it’s worth watchin’. Go Sawx!”

Verdict: Good

Red Sun

The cast of Red Sun

At first I thought this was going to be a comedy. It’s a 1971 film starring Charles Bronson and Toshiro Mifune that is about a cowboy and a samurai teaming up in the Wild West. How could it not be a comedy? Well, it’s not, it’s serious. Fortunately, they did infuse several funny moments and a few funny one-liners along the way. The film doesn’t take itself too seriously, but on the whole, yes, it is a regular Western. Where it lacks in the story department, it makes up for it with charm.

Bronson plays a charismatic outlaw who is forced to team up with Mifune who plays a stoic samurai (does he play anything else?). Their mission is to retrieve a stolen Japanese Imperial sword from Bronson’s former gang who betrayed him and left him for dead. Mifune and Bronson play surprisingly well off one another. They each get their moments to shine, with each besting the other in various scuffles, and each getting to kill plenty of bad guys with their special skills. Ursula Andress is the girl who provides little more than a nice body to look at. The villain is the bland Alain Delon, who apparently is famous, but from this role you’d never guess that.

If not for Mifune, this would be a generic and forgettable Western. However, his character lends a lot of originality to the movie which I’ve never seen anywhere else in the genre. Fortunately, the samurai acts like a samurai should, and doesn’t do a lot of horseshit you’d expect in a Hollywood movie. The movie loses a couple of points for having white guys play Indians, and a sort of derp-tastic finale. Otherwise, though, it’s solid. At least solid enough for an obscure, cult Western. Plus, it’s kind of cool to see Mifune speaking English.

The best part of all, was that I got this movie from Netflix, and the disc they sent me was a Chinese bootleg. It was obvious with all the Chinese characters on the menu, and to start the movie you click the Paly button. I hope Netflix continues to rent bootlegs. They rule.

Verdict: Average


16 Responses to “The Town, Red Sun”

  1. September 22, 2012 at 4:56 am

    I had to read your review of The Town twice. I can’t understand Bostonese!

    Great film. A good role for Renner too. Much better than Legacy. Affleck’s turning out to be a much better director than actor. Though, I’ve never been on the hate Affleck bandwagon. I always thought he was awwwlright.

    • September 22, 2012 at 10:43 am

      Very few people can understand Bostonese. You are absolutely right about Affleck. His acting is very average, but he is a surprisingly good director. He could be phenomenal if he learns to stop putting himself in front of the camera.

  2. September 24, 2012 at 5:29 am

    LOL. I dont believe I’ve ever seen Bostonese written before. 😀 Well done. Very funny. Or should I say, Wicked funny?

    Affleck is two for two as a director, and is doing just fine in front of the camera in his own films… Brrrrik. Lets hope Argo continues the trend.

    • September 24, 2012 at 7:39 am

      Thanks, Fogsy. He’s “just fine in front of the camera”, you’re absolutely right. However, if he replaced his “just fine” with somebody who is capable of turning in incredible performances, then his movies could be so much better. Argo looks like it could be good, so I’m hopeful.

  3. 5 Tarnsman
    September 25, 2012 at 11:58 am

    I’ve been wondering if I should check out The Town, looks like I’ll have to now.

    • September 25, 2012 at 12:21 pm

      Yeah, it’s totally worth watching one time. Apparently, there is a director’s cut that sucks huge ass. So, try to get the theatrical cut.

      • 7 mplo
        January 29, 2013 at 2:04 pm

        I saw the Alternate Ending to “the Town” on youtube. It’s too bad that Ben Affleck didn’t leave that ending in. It might’ve lifted “The Town” up a little bit and made it a somewhat better movie. The Alternate Ending seemed like a better ending than the theatrical ending, because Doug MacRay, like his buddies in crime, finally got his comeuppance (getting shot and killed by the tough guys from the C-Town projects that he and his buddy Jem permanently injured for no justifiable reasons). The Alternate Ending to The Town also sends a different, albeit a better message; That crime doesn’t pay, and that escaping one’s birthplace and familial upbringing is far easier said than done.

      • January 29, 2013 at 3:57 pm

        That is certainly different. I think I prefer the theatrical ending, though. I think the crime doesn’t pay message still comes across.

  4. 9 70srichard
    October 19, 2012 at 8:53 pm

    I saw Red Sun when it came out at the Monterey Theater in Monterey Park. The samurai with the cowboy was what sold me in 1971, that and Charles Bronson is the action star of that decade. I guess I’m going to have to get a Chinese bootleg, was it letterboxed or cropped?

    • October 20, 2012 at 6:39 pm

      If I remember correctly, it was in widescreen aspect ratio. I think it may have been anamorphic, too, but I’m not positive. The video quality wasn’t too bad considering it was a bootleg.

  5. February 13, 2013 at 1:09 am

    I don’t even live in Boston & barely know any people from there, but from what I HAVE heard, I determine your “The Town” review to be Aaah-sum! You did a fine job with the review and the accent! I really want to see this film and hope to.
    The samurai/cowboy Western “Red Sun” sounds odd-y. Maybe I’d give it a look-see since you made it sound decent. “The movie loses a couple of points for having white guys play Indians”…ha! Like Liz Taylor playing a Greek/Persian Cleopatra. Or White people in blackface. I am glad the people playing someone of a particular race isn’t unrealistic, insulting or racist, anymore. Now, since ignorance, laziness and racism is lower than it used to be in Hollywood, no more weirdness.

    Great, very informative post!

  6. 14 mplo
    September 9, 2013 at 7:50 am

    I disagree with you about the ending of The Town, brikhaus. I wish the Alternate Ending had been kept, for the following reasons:

    A) It would’ve clearly put out the “crime doesn’t pay” message, plus the message of realization that escaping one’s birthplace, environmental and parental upbringing is way easier said than done.

    B) The part where Doug and Jem break into the apartment of the two guys who’d presumably thrown bottles at Claire while she unwisely walked through a C-Town housing project would’ve been much more ffeasible and made more sense.

    C) Neither Doug or Claire got punished enough in the theatrical ending. Doug didn ‘t deserve to go free, and Claire shouldn’t have gotten off scott-free either, for that matter.

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