Posts Tagged ‘Rushmore

15
Mar
13

Moonrise Kingdom, Pierrot le Fou

Moonrise Kingdom

Oh wow, they are all such tremendous actors.

Director Wes Anderson is the king of quirky independent movies. Just for that you would think I’d automatically hate him. I don’t because I love the movie Rushmore, which is fucking brilliant. So, I was interested to see his new film, which reunited him with actors he uses often like Bill Murray and Jason Schwartzman. I was also excited to see Edward Norton and Bruce Willis.

Moonrise Kingdom is about two kids who run away from home. Unexpectedly, 90% of the screentime is devoted to their fledgling love affair. Of course, it’s all viewed through a quirky lens. It’s romanticized to an unneccessary degree, and is made annoyingly wholesome and cute. It’s unfortunate because that drains all of the interesting bits out like a vampire. The remaining 10% focuses on the attempts of the other characters to track them down. This is where Norton, Willis, and a troop of Scouts come in.

Parts of the movie are fun, such as the early attempts to track them down, and the later attempt at avoiding capture. These are the highlights of the movie. The rest of it features more camping scenes than a Harry Potter movie. The majority of the movie’s heavy lifting comes from the two leads who were both 12 years old at the time of filming. And, wouldn’t you know it, they fucking suck at acting.

Now, I know what you’re thinking, “LOL BUT BRIK TEHY ARE JUST LITTLE KIDS SO TEHY CANT BE THAT GOOD AT ACTING YET GIVE EM A BREAK LOL!” I’m sorry, but no. You’re wrong. Some kids can be good at acting. Just take a look at Chloe Grace Moretz or that little bastard from The Sixth Sense and tell me their acting is not light years better than the twats in Moonrise Kingdom. The fact that these two can’t act, and that they dominate 90% of the screentime, nearly ruins the movie. Other problems include woefully underdeveloped characters like the parts played by Willis and Murray.

I’m conflicted about this movie. On one hand I want to like it since it’s so off-kilter. On the other hand, the two leads are such horrible actors that the movie should automatically lose points for that. They don’t get a pass for being kid actors. They were both absolutely terrible. It’s like Wes Anderson intentionally sought out shitty kid actors to put in his movie. Maybe he did. Maybe that’s the point? Who knows?

Verdict: Average

Pierrot le Fou

I’m sure this still from the movie has SUPER DEEP MEANING.

If you aren’t a hardcore filmfag, chances are you’ve never heard of this movie. Consider that a blessing. Pierrot le Fuck is a 1965 French movie directed by Jean-Luc Godard. He became a famous director in this era because he liked to film shit in the weirdest way possible, and people thought he was some kind of goddamn genius for it. Pierrot le Fuck is about a couple of egotistical assholes who abandon their families, steal shit, kill some people, and run around like turd burglars for the entire movie. Everybody dies at the end, too, so — spoilers — I guess. The problem really isn’t the story so much as the directing. I couldn’t fucking stand how it was directed. It was way too cool and hip for a troglodyte for me to understand. Everything about it from the way the actors read their lines, to people staring directly at the camera, to how trendy everybody was, to just about fucking everything irritated me to no end. Godard is more pretentious cock gobbler than innovative director. Obviously, this is only a movie for the hardcore amongst us. The only good thing about it was it had some nudity. That’s it. Pierrot le Fuck can go fuck itself. That would be the trendy thing to do.

Verdict: Shitty

08
Mar
13

Classically Shitty: Serpico

Nice hat.

At first, I wasn’t sure if I should make this a Classically Shitty post. Serpico is more of a stupid movie than a shitty one. They had a lot of good pieces (actors, director, true story, etc.), but couldn’t execute them in any logical fashion. Everything that happens, happens in the dumbest possible way. It’s more Classically Stupid than anything else. But then I thought, “You know what? Fuck it.” Serpico is just as Classically Shitty as everything else in this series.

The movie opens with a rip-roaring, high-octane car chase around the streets of New York City where — oh, wait, sorry, I’m thinking of some other movie. Serpico opens with the titular police officer (played by Al Pacino) being casually taken to a hospital after having been shot in the face. People learn of his wounding, and react in the most apathetic manner imaginable. “Huh? What’s that? Serpico was shot? Oh, okay. Hey, did you see the Yankees game last night?” After that, the rest of the movie is told through an extended flashback.

Frank “Paco” Serpico is an honest cop with a great nickname. Serpico is also a really a weird dude. For the first half of the movie he is working in some kind of fingerprint catalog system, and he talks in this weird, kind of nasal, kind of high-pitched voice. He literally prances around the police department like a ballerina. He spends time in the bathroom with other dudes with the lights off. When people accuse him of being gay (even though the film shows us he isn’t), he doesn’t bother to deny it. Eventually, all his hard work talking weird, dancing, and cavorting in bathrooms pays off, and he gets promoted to a new division as a “plainclothes” officer. Continue reading ‘Classically Shitty: Serpico’




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