Snowpiercer
This critically acclaimed 2013 film from South Korea makes you wonder what it takes to make a film “critically acclaimed.” Apparently, it isn’t an interesting story, good action sequences, or wonderful acting, because Snowpiercer has none of those things, but still rocks a 95% on Rotten Tomatoes.
In yet another dreary, boring, post-apocalyptic nightmare, Snowpiercer takes place on a perpetually moving train. The world was completely frozen-over, and the last remnants of humanity took refuge on one insane man’s train, which continues to run indefinitely, despite nobody being alive to maintain the train tracks.
The train is divided into two classes: our heroes (the poor) and the villains (the rich). The rich are stealing children for some reason, so the poor decide to rise up one day and find out what’s going on.
Chris Evans leads the poor people in their uprising. They fight their way to the front of the train with some pretty bland action scenes along the way. Tilda Swinton shows up to chew some scenery, and John Hurt appears to cash a paycheck before both move on to better projects.
Evans finds the crazed engineer, played by Ed Harris, who says they have to use small children to keep the guts of the train clean. Because, yeah, um, just accept it. Some more fighting happens, the train explodes and derails, and everybody dies except for one kid and a Korean chick.
There is nothing unique or thrilling about Snowpiercer. It’s yet another entry into a tired genre that needs to go on extended hiatus.
Verdict: Bad
Fletch
Chevy Chase stars as Fletch, an intrepid reporter hot on a California drug case. Chase is at the height of his comedy powers here, when he was snorting mountains of cocaine, but it hadn’t caused irreparable brain damage yet. He dons plenty of wacky disguises as he investigates a labyrinthine mystery involving an airplane company, the police, and a rich man who wants to be murdered. It isn’t super jokey, and I wouldn’t even say it’s an outright comedy. Yes, there are tons of light moments, and nothing is really taken seriously. But I would almost classify it as a light drama. Chase does a great job moving the action along, and makes the comedy appear effortless. While it is a fun movie, it is rather unmemorable, and I don’t think it has a lot of replay value. Still, it’s worth a watch.
Verdict: Average
Awesomely Shitty 
So, there are some bits of your review of Snowpiercer that I agree with. It is just another dystopian future film where the poor have a shitty life and then you have the rich living it up. But, I really fucking enjoyed the film. The action scenes are awesome – some of the better action sequences I’ve seen in a film for a while that aren’t overly reliant on CG.
The bit with the kids in the guts of the train was a bit weird, granted. And the ending felt bizarre too, but I can’t help but really, really like this film.
For me, I found Snowpiercer bland from top to bottom. I suppose I can appreciate the skill and choreography that went into the fight scenes, and I certainly don’t begrudge the fact that you liked them. As I watched it, I just felt everything was “been there, done that.” I don’t mind recycled ideas that much as long as some kind of fresh spin is put on them. I just couldn’t find that in this movie. Agree to disagree?
Agree 😉
Can’t agree with you on Snowpiercer, but I’m never good with anything to do with Chevy Chase. Fletch has always been meh.
What is the appeal of Snowpiercer, anyway? Is it the bland cinematography, bland story, or bland acting? It must be one of those, right?
I really found myself drawn into the plot, TBH, even if it kinda made no logical sense and can be picked apart easily. The set design and visual effects also hold up, and I think Tilda Swinton made the best of her character, and is probably the most memorable part of the whole thing. Snowpiercer have me a similar vibe to Canadian sci-fi thriller Cube, that dystopian mystery-box sense of claustrophobia where characters have to endure an endurance test to gain their salvation. Each to their own, of course. I can understand those who don’t buy into it – the very idea of an entire population living on an eternally moving train is preposterous, but in terms of the film’s internal logic, that’s probably the least of its problems. 😉
Agree on snowpiercer
Thanks. At least someone agrees with me on that one.
Agree as well. I know several people who pretend to really like Snowpiercer because they claim to be the elitist bunch of people who understand the deeper meaning and cinematography behind this film. I’d call myself actually open minded for arthouse stuff and such, but let alone Snowpiercer’s premise is just a bunch of bullshit. And don’t even talk about all the plot holes.