Lucky Star – What Hath God Wrought?

Die.

April 8, 2007 is a date which will live in infamy. It’s the date that good anime started to die. Until this point in time, anime creators were toying with moe, weak plots, lazy humor, crappy animation, slice-of-life stories, and pandering to the pedophile set. Despite tinkering, they had yet to fully commit. It wasn’t until that fateful day in early spring that they said, “FUCK IT” and went all-out with taking a giant shit on anime as we know it. This is the date that Lucky Star premiered. What was seemingly an unassuming, generic “comedy” series turned into a monstrosity that would be copied and mimicked ad nauseum until the entire anime industry was churning out nothing but moe pieces of shit.

Lucky Star was heaped with praise as being one of the funniest and most original anime series in ages. Naturally, my curiosity was piqued. Of course I wanted to watched something funny and original. Who wouldn’t? But it was a trap. It was a trap against my better sensibilities. What I found upon watching this abomination was the most vile, wretched amalgamation of every moe and slice-of-life cliche imaginable. It was the culmination of years of shitty tropes finally combined to create the ultimate marketing beast designed to sell merchandise, with the anime as an extended commercial for otaku fanboys to jerk off to.

20 Awesomest Anime of the Decade (2000-2009)

I’ve seen me lots of animu in the last decade. I started watching this stuff in late 2001, and it’s ruined my life ever since. That being said, I felt it was my obligation to impart upon you the fact that there are good anime out there. It’s not all moeblobs and slice of life bullshit. So, as it’s so trendy to do right now, I’m giving you my list of the 20 Most Awesomest Anime of 2000’s. Keep in mind that even though I have ranked these, they are all equally awesome. My list probably won’t sit well with the pretentious arthouse goons or the moe-loving fapboys, but rest assured these anime are actually good shows.

20.) Boogiepop Phantom (2000) – This is one of those series where the fun comes in figuring out what the hell is going on. It’s a supernatural thriller, with each episode taking place from the point of view of a different character. I love the washed out color palette, the haunting music, the “realistic” look of the characters (i.e. no crazy hair colors), and the non-linear story. Instead of spoon feeding the viewer, it allows you to deduce what really happened on your own, although this may require multiple viewings. As the “angel of death,” Boogiepop doesn’t really have a name that would inspire fear in anybody, but if you watch this series late at night with the lights off, you might get a little freaked out.

19.) Paprika (2006) – A film from a true master, Satoshi Kon. While Millenium Actress is probably his most praised work, I find that there is something intangibly better about this movie. Kon continually plays with themes of identity and reality, and he does so to perfection here. In a future world where people can use technology to enter dreams, a doctor is attempting to use it to help psychiatric patients. She uses a persona known as Paprika. As the movie progresses, the line between what is real and what is the dream world blurs. Eventually, things spiral out of control, and climax in one of the weirdest and most incredible finales ever put to film.

Top 30 Anime Openings (with Video Evidence): Part 2

I’m back with the second entry in this three part series. This week, the next ten openings will be revealed. These range greatly in terms of style and music. Every single one is different, and cool in their own way. Enough talk, let’s get on to the openings. Part three will be posted next week.

Note: Sometimes after watching so many embedded files, Youtube audio files will stop working, or the entire file will load incredibly slowly. If that happens, reload the page, and everything will work again.

20.) The Vision of Escaflowne – No Need for Promises by Maaya Sakamoto

A classic series deserves a really good opening. I’ve always found Maaya Sakamoto’s singing to be rather soothing. The song is upbeat, and the visuals showcase a wide variety of the thematic elements that appear in the show. Overall, a well composed intro.

19.) Dai-Guard – Back Alley Space Boy by The Cobra Twisters

Baa ba ba baa ba ba ba ba baa ba ba barara ra ra ra ra!!!!!!!! Catchiest opening song ever? Yep.

18.) Excel Saga – Love (Loyalty) by The Excel Girls

It’s a pretty rare thing for a comedy series to have an opening that is actually funny. This one has a lot of visual humor, as well as jokes in the song lyrics. It also earns points for its general weirdness. Every aspect of this series is top-notch (not to mention completely insane), including the opening.